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Choosing A Date: The Must-Haves
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Elegant Wedding Designs by Nancy
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How Do You Match Your Style To Your Gown?
Today's wedding gown marketplace offers a delightful confusion of options and styles. The bride-to-be is faced with selections that veer wildly from sleek, form-fitting sheaths to Glinda-the-good-witch confections. The bride can choose to look like a medieval queen or a fairy princess, or she can don a tailored suit.
Before you start fantasizing about the length of your train or the details on your sleeves, you need to ask yourself a few questions in order to narrow your search. Question 1: What style of wedding do you want? Formal, informal, or somewhere in between?
Whether you realize it or not, you probably have a good idea of the general style of your wedding, even if you haven't yet chosen your location or decided on the size of your guest list. Look at the following broadly drawn definitions and see which one best matches your vision. If you can adopt one of these categories as your own, it will help inform all kinds of future decisions and help you select everything from flowers to guest accommodations.
THE FORMAL WEDDING
"Formal" comes in many packages. But whether it takes place in a palace or in the church around the corner, virtually all formal weddings have a few things in common.
A formal wedding is one in which you will most likely:
- Have a religious ceremony in a cathedral, church, synagogue, or other place of worship
- Have a full reception in a hotel ballroom, a mansion, museum, country club, cruise ship, or other upscale location
- Have assigned dinner seating at the reception
- Outfit your groom and his groomsmen in tuxedos, traditional morning coats, or other formal attire
- Dress your attendants in matching gowns and shoes
For a formal wedding, you'll probably want to limit your gown choices to those which are:
- White or off-white
- Floor length
- Outfitted with a cathedral-length or chapel-length veil, plus a train in the same length
- Made from luxurious fabrics such as silk, satin, velvet, and/or brocad
- Graced by a Queen Anne, bertha, or wedding-band collar
- Detailed with seed pearls, lace, jewels, beading, sequins, etc.
- Accessorized with gloves
- Worn with a tiara or other formal headpiece
THE SEMIFORMAL WEDDING
This vast category includes all sorts of weddings, some of which might mix formal with informal. More often, however, a semiformal wedding is one in which you might choose to:
- Have your ceremony in a chapel, garden, private home, or sentimental or scenic location
- Host a sit-down or buffet-style catered reception outdoors under a tent, or welcome your guests at a hall, restaurant, seaside pavilion, private function room, etc.
- Dress your groom in a tux or a suit with a four-in-hand tie
- Have only a few attendants and groomsmen in coordinated outfits
- Skip certain traditions, such as the receiving line or announced introductions
For a semiformal wedding, your gown choices might include:
- White, off-white, or pale pastel tones
- Ankle-length, tea-length (just above the ankle), or intermission-length hem (anywhere between the knee and the ankle)
- Styles ranging from costume-historic to ballerina to avant- garde
- No train, but perhaps a long veil, short veil, pouf, or a headpiece without a veil
- Stylish or festive gown fabrics such as silk shantung, taffeta, tulle, charmeuse, chiffon, or organza
THE INFORMAL WEDDING
Often, an outdoor setting is the star at an informal wedding. However, like its formal and semiformal sisters, the informal affair can take many forms.
An informal wedding might include the following:
- Nontraditional or personally written vows recited in a private home, on a pier, on the beach, on a rooftop, in a nightclub, etc.
- Buffet-style dinner, or picnic, clambake, or barbecue, with nonassigned seating
- Groom outfitted in expressive, unconventional attire
- Few or no attendants
- Creative new traditions in place of the garter ritual and bouquet toss
An informal bride might consider wearing:
- A dress that strays from traditional shades of white into more adventurous colors such as lavender, pale yellow, or blush pink
- A two-piece dress, a suit, a tunic outfit, a sundress, or a simple sheath
- A crown of flowers
- Earrings and hair ornaments in lieu of a headpiece and veil
- Details that reflect or celebrate the setting, such as leaf or shell motifs
TIME OF YEAR
Another important, and undeniably practical, consideration when
shopping for a gown is the season in which you plan to marry. In the
bad old days, a bride simply wouldn't wear a strapless gown in January;
today, those notions of seasonally correct attire have been thrown out.
However, there are fabric and style choices that lend themselves nicely
to each season.
For winter weddings, consider:
- Heavy fabrics such as satin, brocade, and velvet
- Long sleeves
- Higher necklines
- Silver or gold accents
- Headpieces that incorporate a hat, possibly made from fur or feathers
- Fur or faux fur trim, or a stole or muff
- Kid gloves
- Lace-up wedding boots
- Bridal coat
For autumn weddings, good choices include:
- Medium-weight fabrics such as taffeta, raw silk, silk shantung, silk-faced satin, and silk gazar
- Sweetheart, bateaux, or scoop necklines
- Lighter-weight trains
- A snood
- Autumn-toned embroidered detail on the dress
- A decorative shawl
- Three-quarter length sleeves or above-the-elbow gloves
- A mantilla made of heavy lace
For spring weddings, try:
- Fabrics such as silk tulle, organza, or charmeuse
- A pillbox hat or a decorated headband, with or without a veil
- Tea-length or intermission-length skirts
- Cap sleeves or off-the-shoulder neckline with short gloves
- Open-toed shoes
Summer wedding favorites include:
- Cool fabrics like linen, polished cotton, chiffon, tulle, and organza
- Spaghetti strap, halter, strapless, or backless styles
- Short, medium-length, or ankle-length skirts
- Wide-brimmed, polished straw hat or picture hat
- Fresh flower headpiece, with or without a veil
- Strappy sandals
PRICE CONSIDERATIONS
Your wedding gown might be the most expensive dress you purchase in
your whole life. Or not. Sharp-eyed, budget-minded brides might be able
to pick up a dress on sale, right off the rack, for as little as $300,
then pay for any needed alterations. The sentimental bride might honor
her heritage -- and save a bundle -- by wearing her mother's or her
grandmother's wedding gown (again, alteration costs might apply). But
the average bride can expect to pay a minimum of $800 for her gown,
depending on her taste and where she shops. Designer gowns usually
start at about $1,500, and can cost upwards of $10,000.
A general rule is that the bride's attire should represent 6 to 15
percent of the entire wedding budget. That final figure should include
the cost of a headpiece and veil (about $150 to $400); bridal shoes
($60 to $300); lingerie ($50 to $120); and accessories such as jewelry,
purse, gloves, wrap, etc. (allow $100 to $500 or more, depending on the
look you're going for).
DEFINING YOUR PERSONAL STYLE
If you wear tailored clothes in your day-to-day life and have a closet
full of minimalist suits and conservative shoes, chances are you won't
be happy in a frothy gown with miles of taffeta skirt -- even if you
(or your mother) develop a crush on it while you're in the bridal shop.
Conversely, if you're a girl who loves fanciful garb and lives to dress
up, a simple sheath probably won't make you happy, no matter how fine
the fabric or elegant the cut or how much your best friend loves it on
you.
Where fantasy meets reality, where fashion meets physique, there is that illusive, crucial quality called personal style. Though there are as many versions of personal style as there are brides, your search will be more successful if you narrow your choices down to styles that reflect the woman you are.